AS SMALL AS A WORLD AND AS LARGE AS ALONE.

XVII

“I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way than this:
where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep. ”

Pablo Neruda: Neftalí Ricardo Reyes Basoalto

The clouds, at once, parted and I regained the vision...the vision of happiness.  I remembered who I was and realized where I wanted to be.  After this realization, there was no turning back, no way to pretend again, no intention of pushing ahead.  There was not a clean break.  The past invades my present and blurs my future.  Again I feel the chain yanking at my neck as I venture forward into life, as if I'm a dog...on a leash...in your yard...and I've run out of slack.  But I don't belong to you.

jmv

As it once was, it is again.

Days, weeks, months, years past

Today feels as it did then

And tomorrow shows no signs of change

Thoughts and questions free-flowing

Are now stifled and suppressed

Objurgating eyes, judging

Hurt feelings

Reproaching words, spewing

Harshly over-analyzing my every thought

Keep out of my head

jmv

Rainy days

Few and far in between
Lovely, cleansing, free
Come down on me
Refresh my spirit
Renew my mentality
Let my worries trickle away as you do
Then, as quickly as you come, you go...
You can't be controlled
But don't let it be too long before I feel you again.

jmv